I Looked at the Sky

Why is this significant?

I use to look at the sky all  the time. I would take countless pictures of clouds and sunbeams. I would marvel at the wonders of the sky. I would dream of playing in the clouds and think, "If only I could grab a piece." I would worship my God and dream of dancing with Him in the sky. I would marvel at the beauty of what God had made.

As I looked at the sky and how the clouds moved and light caught on the white pillows I realized I could not remember the last time I looked at the sky, really looked at it, and marveled. It was one of those moments that only lasted a few minutes, but felt like half a day. I looked in wonder. I worshiped my God. I thought, "If only I could grab a piece or lie on it like a fluffy bed." I wanted to dance and soar up into the sky. It took me back to a time when I would stop and focus on the beauty of creation.

Why have I stopped looking? Why have I stopped marveling? Why have I stopped looking for my Lord to come back and take me with Him?

I have no real answer, only that I have stopped looking up like I should. I look around too much. I saw God's glory in those clouds and a reminder of how big He really is.

Thank You, God, for reminding me I need to be looking up at You and not at the circumstances around me. Help me to see Your glory and bask it Your rays.

Jamey's First Braves Game

Yesterday Jim, Jamey, Gabriel and I loaded up for a day trip to Cincinnati for Jamey's (and Gabriel's) first Braves game! It was exciting to hear and see his excitement as we talked on the way, walked to the stadium and watched the game. At 4 years old he was a bit restless, but overall seemed to enjoy the game that was playing below. We had great seats in the front of the top deck so we could see very well. This was such a blessing! It was also a great test of faith for me. There was glass so that he could not get over, but it was still a bit nerve wrecking as Jamey is a climber so an eye had to be on him at every moment.
By God's grace he listened and obeyed and watched and cheered (though often for the wrong team :) ) and we had a good time. Jamey did ask for some cotton candy and we allowed it for his first game. (Why is this stuff over priced at baseball games?) He did complain about being hot and asked for more sunscreen to feel cooler. Kids are so funny.
The ride to and from Cincinnati were also sweet. Jamey sang Come to the Feast, which was so precious. I am hoping his love for singing will continue and he will sing more openly. We talked about baseball, what he saw outside of the window, and Truth as we drove. These are the moments that are few and fleeting. I am learning to embrace them. It was so exciting to be present for this first experience for Jamey and I hope to see many more experiences as he learns and grows.

Help Me!!!

This has been my daily prayer for the past year. When we found out that we would be welcoming our 4th child just over a year ago I was so excited that our family would be expanding again. Not long after the morning sickness hit and I was tired.

Help Me!

We also closed on our house and began renovations. This meant trips to Home Depot, Lowes, paint stores, hours on the internet and lots of decisions for an already frazzled brain.

Help Me!

Everything in the renovations and getting inspections done took much longer than expected. This meant moving at the end of August in the heat and humidity with 3 little ones and a super pregnant woman.

Help Me!

Unpacking and organizing a new home came next. Though it was a blessing, it was easy to make it into a burden. Our Brothers and Sisters rallied behind us and supported us, but still much was on me.

Help Me!

Back into real life. Jim and Becca were in school. Lillian still needed to be toilet trained. The kids were going bananas all the time. I was big and tired. All I wanted to do was hang out on the sofa. There was much inner turmoil and questioning as well as personal conflicts that I was uncertain how to handle. My brain was beyond fried and I was schooling my 2 oldest with what little energy I could muster.

Help Me!

A week after Thanksgiving (at least a week and a half before I was expecting) my water broke and we welcomed Gabriel into our family. Such an excited and blessed time, but still overwhelming.

Help Me!

Four beautiful children now blessed our home. They are a blessing, I must remind myself. Between fights and hugs, laughter and tears some days I do now know which end is up. These 4 blessings remind me how much I cannot do it on my own.

Help Me!

Many days that is all I can say. I want to love well. Help me love well. I want to teach them well. Help me to teach them. I want them to know the Lord. Help me to show them who You are! Four kids has shown me just how powerless I am and how much I need God. When I struggle to pray, these two words escape my mouth: HELP ME! It's a prayer I know God will answer, for He helps His children in their time of need.

April 29 to May 5

1621. Gabriel turning 5 months! (Should have been on last weeks)
1622. Having young children
1623. Seeing them grow more everyday
1624. Great school time
1625. Going on a "date" to the grocery store
1626. Doing well at the grocery store :)
1627. Yummy ham for lunch
1628. Super productive afternoon
1629. Getting appointments made
1630. Making a great to do list
1631. Getting some emails written
1632. Jim's impromptu black bean quesadillas (so yummy!)
1633. Jamey giving a quite a dramatic recitation of Psalm 23
1634. Making cookies with the kids
1635. Getting 15 surveys filled out thus far
1636. Being encouraged in pursuing doing a childbirth class
1637. Getting some of the computer cleaned off
1638. Cleaning some again!
1639. Beginning to get back on track in keeping the home
1640. Realizing I need to write everything down
1641. Spending a nice family evening together
1642. Sleeping a little later
1643. Being able to get up
1644. Having Sisters to pray for each other
1645. Great morning at school
1646. Playing at Willow park
1647. Reuben trying out the slide
1648. Meeting Calvin!
1649. Finding out another Sister is having a baby!
1650. Opportunity to talk to the kids about trusting God and not fearing
1651. Nice rest time
1652. Getting more cleaning/organizing done
1653. Working on needed things
1654. Homemade frozen dinner :)
1655. Water aerobics
1656. Community group
1657. Praying for a Brother and Sister who feel hopeless (and so thankful they were able to make it)
1658. Talking about why we don't share and what we would be willing to give up for God (have been doing some thinking)
1659. Encouraging a Sister and answering questions about pregnancy
1660. Fellowship at BSF
1661. Encouraging conversation
1662. Thinking about where God is moving me and what I am holding onto
1663. Kids playing outside
1664. Kids asking to play outside
1665. Organizing stuff on sofa
1666. Managing to keep the TV off until 6:30 pm
1667. Jamey wanting to do so much book work that we did a whole weeks worth of language arts
1668. Doing a Russian lesson as a whole family
1669. Flexibility of homeschooling
1670. Making dinner with Jim
1671. Semi early bed time
1672. God being sovereign over all things
1673. Lillian's 3rd birthday!
1674. Jim making really yummy eggs for breakfast
1675. Good school time this morning
1676. Going to the zoo as a family
1677. Lillian loving the animals and asking to see particular ones
1678. Kids repeating all the names of the animals
1679. Reuben enjoying seeing the animals
1680. Seeing Bonnie and her family
1681. Seeing Susan
1682. Yummy lunch at El Nopal
1683. Running into Brooks
1684. Play time and photos outside
1685. Lillian loving her jump rope
1686. Watching her play with Jamey
1687. Lillian jumping and singing "I'm a Little Dutch Girl"
1688. Lillian trying to jump with Jamey and I holding the rope
1689. Jamey trying to jump with Lillian and I holding the rope
1690. Nice family dinner
1691. Taking Lillian to Pie Kitchen (she loved her Smurf ice cream)
1692. More cleaning
1693. Blogging
1694. Kids running around and playing together
1695. Smooth bed time
1696. Relaxing evening
1697. Getting pictures uploaded
1698. Brit calling to talk to Lillian
1699. Rachel calling to talk to Lillian
1700. Another year with Lillian
1701. All up before 7
1702. Getting everything ready
1703. Having 2 new ladies at women's prayer
1704. Becca playing with the kids outside
1705. A powerful time of prayer
1706. Hearing that a law did not pass! (Praise the Lord!)
1707. Getting school done before prayer time
1708. Jamey wanting to do more book work this afternoon
1709. Completing another week of his language arts program
1710. Learning patience (even though it is hard right now)
1711. Figuring out when Jim can work a little extra
1712. Jamey walking around in Jim's shirt saying "I'm Daddy!"
1713. Jamey telling us that he will be a daddy one day
1714. Gabriel rolling back to front
1715. Uploading pictures (really would love a faster way to do this)
1716. Journaling!
1717. Smooth bed time
1718. Hanging with Becca
1719. Having good conversations
1720. Smooth Saturday morning
1721. Writing Group
1722. Yummy breakfast
1723. Having Christian women as sounding boards
1724. Being able to encourage and uplift each other
1725. Seeing God work in ways that we never thought
1726. Seeing someone I once knew on Jeopardy
1727. Quiet Saturday afternoon
1728. More pictures uploaded
1729. Watching movies with Becca
1730. Kids crashing out by 7
1731. Early morning
1732. God teaching me patience and consistency
1733. Seeing Laura baptized!
1734. Seeing two others baptized! (I love baptism Sunday)
1735. Learning more about God's glory
1736. Being reminded that I cannot manipulate God and that I really don't want a god I can manipulate
1737. An amazing time of corporate worship
1738. God is merciful
1739. Hearing testimonies of changed lives
1740. Yummy lunch
1741. Kids are young enough for things to go over their heads
1742. Fun family evening
1743. Getting emails written
1744. Early bed time
1745. Cookie cake

I NEED TO WRITE!!!!!

After looking at my evaluation for the month of April and attending my writing group today, I have really been struck with how little I have written lately and this is not good! At least not for me. God has given me the ability to write and He has shown me that He wants me to write. I am not always 100% sure what He wants me to write, but I know that by not writing I am hording a talent God has given me and that is sin. So I confess my sin before you and ask that you keep me accountable. There are many areas that I need to write in such as blogging, working on my book, starting another book I am feeling compelled to write, emails, letters of encouragement and a childbirth education curriculum.

That is a lot of writing!

But God keeps pressing it on me. I know I need to obey, but I always find ways around it or think that other things should come first. (Yes, many things do come before writing. I fully acknowledge that and ask that you pray that I will keep all things in proper priority.) Pray that I would seek God every day in what He wants me to write.

I am planning this month to do a few Motherhood Mondays where I share a little of where I am and what God is teaching me about motherhood. I hope this will be encouraging to many.

Pray for Europe

Today as the women gathered to pray we remember Europe. Once the seat of Christendom, this continent is now dark with very little Gospel witness. Because of the great cathedrals that are vast in many of the cities, many assume that Christianity still permeates this area. But this is not the case. We are starting to see the rumblings of a Spiritual Awakening in this continent as the Holy Spirit moves throughout. We are hearing stories from west to east and pray that many more stories of God's grace will come out of the work that is going on in Europe.

Pray for this continent and ask that God will make Europe His!

Lillian is 3!

These past 3 years have flown by. My little 6 lbs baby girl is now a preschool girl. Yes, she is still little, but she has grown so much. Her verbal skills always amaze me. Something has clicked recently and her sentences are grammatically correct much of the time. Her vocabulary is every growing. Her love of learning Scripture is my favorite though. I realize that all children can memorize vast amounts of information, but her love of saying Bible verses is amazing. She knows Psalm 23, Proverbs 31:10-31 and most of Psalm 67 along with other verses throughout the Bible.

I love her hugs. I love that she wants be snuggle and be near me. I pray that I will cherish and guide these moments so that she is looking at God, the giver of life and all good things, and not me. She has the most beautiful smile and bright eyes. She loves life!

Lillian loves flowers and blowing the dandelions in our yard. She loves skirts and dresses but also loves her pants. She loves her "baby" and is learning how to take care of it in the way a 3 year old understands. She is becoming a mama hen and it is cute though many times oversteps her bounds. It is a beautiful thing to see her already showing a caring spirit, the nurture side of a woman.

Lillian loves her brothers and often times does not know what to do when they are not around. I pray that they will all have a close relationship and that she will learn from them about boys, but I also pray for wisdom in teaching her how to do things on her own or with others but without her brothers.
God is truly at work in her life right now and I am so thankful that He is! God has blessed us so much with Lillian's life and I praise Him for her life. God has grown all of us because of her and I know that He will continue to use her life to reach others for His Name and for His glory.