The Flirtation Experiment

This book was recommended as part of the 2022 Anchored Women Book Club for their February read. 

I was kind of excited about this book when I first got it and even the introduction had me hopeful. But this is one was back and forth for me. I really appreciate the honesty of the two women who wrote this book. 

They shared appropriately their own struggles in their marriages and gave realistic perspective. Lisa Jacobson is a mother of eight, which also helped because I knew she wasn't going to make outlandish suggestions for mothers with many littles in the quest to flirt more with your husband. 

My struggle was the same as it usually is when reading books that tell you how to spark your relationship with your husband, no real definition of what things meant in their mind. Lisa and Phylicia gave great suggestions in their chapters and were extremely practical and down to earth. They were very much, in a kind way, telling women to get over themselves and take some chances to meet your husband on his playing field. That is clearly something that is going to be harder for some than others, but their approach was straight forward and pointed people to God as their help when this is difficult. They were also very clear that if any abuse was going on to seek help right away! 

But many of the chapters felt very much the same even though they were given different titles of ways to flirt with your husband. The suggestions were different and the idea might have been written by one in one aspect and by the other in another, but the idea, if I'm looking for a definition, was in essence the same. 

If you're not a huge romantic, you may struggle with this book like I did, or you may love the ideas to make you more "romantic" in thought, at least the way we seem to describe it in America. If you are a romantic you will probably like it a lot. 

The writing is clear and well formed, so full marks on that front. But again, a bit redundant in ideology. This is a book that would work really well if you know where your weaknesses are for a 30 day challenge. Or if you are in a rough place finding the one you need to work on the most and spending 30 days on one. I do appreciate that you can read each chapter as a stand alone and get what you need from it. The chapters do not build on themselves. Because of this, there is a LOT you can do with this book, which makes it a rare commodity, especially in the Christian Marriage world. 

They are also very much about looking to God to be able to do this. Because of that this book gets a high view in my opinion, even though I'm not keen on the way some things were presented personally. 

I would give this book 4 stars and recommend it, but I would likely ask what someone was looking for before recommending it outright. 

Reading Challenges:

2022 Anchored Women Book Club: February Read

2022 Reading Challenge with Tim Challies: A book about marriage in Obsessed Reader list

2022 Christian Reading Challenge with Jami Balmet: Marriage

2022 Intentional By Grace Reading Challenge: A book for the season your in from Level 2

Family Worship by Donald Whitney

I was able to knock this book out in 2 short reading sessions and it was such an encouragement! We had the privilege to study under Donald Whitney at Southern Seminary, so I was not at all surprised by this book, but it was a blessing to read for us right now.

God has really been teaching us about family worship and building a family ministry business to encourage and help other families really seeking to teach their children the Bible and growing in family discipleship. This book solidified everything we have been working on and showed us we are headed in the right direction! 

If you need a good brief overview of having family worship and the simplicity of it, this book is a great resource! I highly recommend this book!

5 stars

Reading Challenges:

2022 Reading Challenge with Tim Challies: A book about Christian Living in the Avid Reader List

2022 Christian Reading Challenge with Jami Balmet: Parenting/Family Life book

2022 Intentional By Grace Reading Challenge: For the season you're in Level 1

Ragged

This book was recommended as part of the 2022 Anchored Women Book Club, and I am very thankful that it was on the list. As a recovering legalist and perfectionist, I can easily get worn out trying to do it all. Gretchen Ronnevik gives a very grace filled approach to practicing the spiritual disciplines, especially for mamas who's lives are full doing what God has called them to do day in and day out. 

The first six chapters are a call to remember who God is and His ways. While there was a lot of excellent information and being pointed to Truth, I sometimes struggled in these sections to truly understand what she was getting at until the end of the chapter. I'm not sure if it is so much her writing style as it was my tired mama brain, but I didn't enjoy this part as much as I did the rest of the book where the disciplines were discussed. There were excellent points made from quotes she shared and my notes show that many things struck a chord, so in that I would recommend it and I will be reading this book again even with struggling with the first part this last time around.

The rest of the book discusses the spiritual disciplines: rest, Bible reading, prayer, meditation, fasting, confession, generosity, lament and discipleship. I know that most of these are on pretty much any list you will find on spiritual disciplines, but there are a couple that struck a chord as I don't remember them previously on lists.

Lament in particular caught me off guard, but it really hit home, especially with all that is going on in the world. In our society we're so often told to just keep going. Do feel, keep working and you'll get better. But that's not really the case is it? Especially not for Christians. We know the world is broken and not the way it ought to be. When things happen, we need to take time to grieve. And not only that when it's not our time to grieve we are to help others grieve. Gretchen shares how someone did this for her and it was amazing. I had tears in my eyes as she recounted what another family did for her during an intense time of grief and I was blown away. I want to be that for others and I want others to be willing to do that for me if I was in a place of mourning. It was deeply challenging and convicting. That chapter alone made the book a must read for me. 

The other chapters also challenged me and gave me some freedom as she talked about different seasons and how these might look different in different seasons. Welcoming our 11th blessings has changed a lot of dynamics this time because of the personalities of the others and the ages and stages they are in. It reminded me that it's OK if I'm unable to have four hours of uninterrupted prayer and Bible reading every day like I want. It's OK for my generosity to look different than those who are single, empty nesters or in another phase. 

Freedom in Christ sums up the book and I pray that if you read this book, it will help you find the freedom in Christ you need to be able to live well in the season He has you in right now!

4.5 stars for this book on spiritual disciplines.

Reading Challenges:

2022 Anchored Women Book Club January Book

2022 Reading Challenge with Tim Challies: A book about spiritual disciplines in the Obsessed Reader list

2022 Christian Reading Challenge with Jami Balmet: Spiritual Disciplines

2022 Intentional by Grace Reading Challenge: About Christian Living in level 1

18 Years of Marriage

It's been 18 years since we said, "I do"! We have now known each other half of our lives and it's strange to realize that that is even possible. 

This year has been different. So many things are the same but I don't know another word to describe it. 

Maybe it's because we found out our 11th blessing was formed and growing just after our anniversary last year, and this year has been mostly consumed by that, even though that's not really new for us. 

Maybe it's because God has shown us a bigger and different vision for ministry than we expected and we're now working on building that together. 

Maybe it's because we have a teenager now and we've moved into the next phase of parenting along with all of the other stages. Having such a wide range of parenting has many unique challenges. 

Maybe it's because things have become more normal, and yet things are not at all what they were before the pandemic in the whole of life. 

Maybe it's some of all of it and even other things. It's hard to say. 

All that we know for sure is that God has been with us, guiding us, challenging us, protecting us, growing us, and showing us what it means to trust Him and His leading, even when we don't know or understand what He's doing. 

And we're doing life together. We're learning what it means to do life together, to do life as a family, to teach, train, disciple and evangelize our children well and to be good disciples ourselves. 

Perhaps more than anything this year we've learned how inadequate we truly are to do this amazing task that God has given to us, and yet by HIS grace, we have everything we need to do what He has called us to.

Here's to next year and the many years to come (if Jesus doesn't come back!)!!

(We've only taken 3 pictures together in the last year, this one is from Thanksgiving, the last time we took one of just us. If that doesn't say different, I don't know what does in our world!) 

Brisingr

The third installment of The Inheritance Cycle was intriguing and well written just as the first two books in the series were. The amount of imagination and creativity to create the world of Alagaesia and the story spelled out in this book are completely incredible. 

We follow Eragon as he and his cousin, Roran, go to rescue Katrina and through their adventure back to the Varden as the Varden seek to take down Galbatorix and end his tyrannical rule of Alagaesia. 

After watching Eragon's transformation to a Rider in Eldest, this book shows us the practical side of learning as he must take what he has learned from others and figure out how it applies to what he must do. We see the wrestling with the unknown, the battle of revenge vs mercy, and all that lay between as anyone seeks what is best to do in any given circumstance. 

The story is spell binding and captivating. The writing is exceptional. 

My biggest struggle with this book is some of the gore described in the midst of these battles. Because of what Paolini is attempting to accomplish, I can understand why it is there. However, I did feel that at times it was extreme and teetering on unnecessary. 

If you enjoy fantasy, I absolutely recommend this series. 

I do only give it 4 stars, however, due to the violence and some things that I felt could have been left out or handled more delicately.

Reading Challenges:

Tim Challies 2022 Christian Reading Challenge: A book recommended by a family member (Jim) in the Avid Reader section

My Reading Life Challenge: A book chosen by Jim

2022 Intentional by Grace Challenge: Book with One-word title in Level 3

2022 Christian Reading Challenge: Fiction

Jim's 39th Birthday

 Jim is 39 years old today. 

It's been a year of adjustment as life on the whole returned to normal, but we added another blessing to our family, which means a different normal off and on. Per usual Jim stepped up. He worked his 40 hour weeks in the PACU, come home to let me rest, deal with any major issues from the day and spend time with our children. On his days off he takes care of projects around the house and we have been working on our family ministry business, The Manor Manor. 

God has been doing some incredible work on Jim!

As our life has been so full, God has been teaching Jim how much he needs God to fill him so he can do the good works God has prepared for him to do. With the working of God comes spiritual warfare and it has been intense. As we press forward it often felt like two steps forward, three steps back as it frequently can with spiritual warfare. But God has been faithful, breaking down walls, dispelling lies and showing Jim that he belongs to God and that means he can do everything that God has called him too with God's help.

He's really grown in discipleship this year and teaching our children to follow God. We've been working on Bible and Breakfast as a family and that has been a great time of discussion, even on mornings that are rushed. Jim's learning so much about what it means to teach and train your children while living a typical lifestyle of America and is preparing to encourage and teach other men to do the same. It's Jim's heart to see fathers leading their family in the ways of God and also to encourage mothers in their journey as well. This year God has show Jim the importance of family and what it means to live out Joshua 24:15, "As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD." It has made Jim want to be a better leader and to grow in his own leadership both inside and outside our home.

As we have been teaching, discipling and evangelizing our children this year, we have developed some tools to help us and others with teaching God's Word and we're excited to make more and help others. 

Father thank You for Jim! Thank You for giving our family a man after Your own heart who wants to lead well, serve well, provide well and teach well. Please continue to grow Jim in wisdom and knowledge and give him Your vision for our family as he leads us. Thank You for giving him the desire to teach and encourage others. Show him how to do these things well as he grows in You. Fill Jim to overflowing with Your Spirit! We pray all of this in Jesus's Name! Amen!

Our 12-Year-Old Lillian

It's been 12 years since Lillian made her whirlwind trip into this world, God protecting her every step of the way when we were unaware of the dangers that were there. Today she adds even more life and smiles to our family with her smile, her laugh, her life.

This year Lillian has grown in knowing God and trusting Him. She is in the Word studying it and learning what it means. She prays for others and herself. She makes sure we are praying for our missionary friends, the people groups we're learning about in school, our friends, and our family. She is learning what it means to be a woman after God's own heart. As she reads God's Word, Lillian is learning how to apply it to her life and how God has created her as a young woman with the talents and gifts He has given to her. Whether caring for family, people, church or home she is always noticing, taking it all in, processing and beginning to act in those ways. She's growing in learning as well, knowing that she needs correction and guidance to be more like Jesus. It's been beautiful to watch her grow in the Truth this past year.

God has made Lillian an incredible baker! She blesses our family with treats regularly. On top of this she is also in the beginning stages of operating her own bakery. This past year and a half she has been making a cake for Jim's unit every month as well as baking for friends and family events. This is her passion and it's so fun to watch her grow in trying different cakes and ingredients. Last month she got rave reviews on her carrot cake (which happens to be her great grandmother's recipe, for whom she was named). She also enjoys baking cookies, brownies and blondies from scratch, and other lesser known desserts like tuiles and tarte tatin also from scratch. She's growing in the finer parts of presentation but her flavors are on point most of the time! She's not afraid to experiment either. God has given her a beautiful confidence to give new recipes a try, usually with amazing results. What an incredible gift that God has given her!

Along with baking, Lillian enjoys reading. If she's not in the kitchen, The American Girl series, Dear America series, and The Baxter Family series are among her favorites that she has read multiple times. Currently she's reading The Blue Fairy Book and enjoying it. 

Lillian also enjoys learning about geography and cultures. She is currently learning where every country is in the world. She also enjoys being outside exploring nature or reading on the grass or in a tree. 

Lillian is also loving having a sister. It is a blessing to watch her with Esther. Even with a ten year age gap they are already building a special bond. They are now sharing a room and Lillian is consistently teaching Esther, making sure she has what she needs, taking her outside and talking to her about what she is doing. It is amazing to see God's love growing between them. What a special gift He has given to Lillian and Esther!

And it doesn't scare Lillian from desiring a family of her own when it's time. God has truly blessed her with a love and desire for family and home. Right now she is learning what that means for how God has created her. It is a joy to watch her grow in Godliness and Biblical womanhood as she learns more about God and herself.

Father thank You, for Lillian and how You continue to grow her in wisdom, in stature and in favor with God and man. Thank You for the joy and life she brings to our family and home! Thank You for giving her Your heart and growing her in Your ways. Thank You for the young woman You are creating her to be. She is such a blessing! Continue to teach her in Your Word and Ways and make her more like Jesus everyday. We pray this in Jesus Name. Amen!