"O Father, use my ransomed life
In any way You choose"
This line from "All I Have Is Christ" by Sovereign Grace music has been stuck in my head for weeks now. I wrote a couple of years about The Scariest Prayer Every Christian Should Pray and have been reminded so much since then how this phrase goes right along with that idea. This prayer is just as scary, because it means that you are inviting to God to do what He wants with your life. Are you ready for that ride?
I've been thinking so much about this for many reasons.
1. We are expecting our 7th child in under 7.5 years. I cannot tell you the number of people who have told me I'm crazy or I'm a saint. To each I think, "No, it's just the life God has given me." If I'm crazy, then God must be insane for giving me all of these kids. And there is no way I'm a saint because God is using all of these kids to continuing sanctifying me. I have always desired a big family, but never thought it would happen like this. God is using my life surrendered to Him to build this family and bring people into this world, I pray, for His Kingdom and Glory!
2. The last few years have been far harder than I ever imagined! Between family, school, work, dealing with sin and learning to be more like Jesus, it has been such a challenge. But God, in His great grace and mercy, has seen me through and shown me that my life is in His hands and He will do what He wills with my life because His plans, His purposes, His ways are so much higher and greater than ours. His chief aim is His glory and our good.
3. Right now we're in a weird limbo. Jim has a year left of school and our future is still unclear. Our hope and prayer is to go international and we believe that is where we are going, but right now that path is hidden. It is causing me to pray this, seek His will, but ultimately say, "Use my ransomed life in anyway You choose, because I know whatever You choose will be best."
Is it easy to fully surrender? No! But God has used this time in Louisville to teach me to surrender to Him at all cost, even when it doesn't make sense. I still fight, question and wrestle, but each time I learn more that His way is best and surrendering my life fully to His will is what is always best.
How is God asking you to use your ransomed life?